i'm done watching a malay drama at tv3 and suddenly, i was really into that drama. i dont care whether u guys think this is lame. its about an evil mother in law and sounds so snake to the family. she talks with polite sentence but it was actually the meanest thing to say.

i was working very far away from my family and this drama shows the mother is missing her daughter very much. then, i'm thinking about my mum at home. yes, i called her everyday but its just not the same when u r there. plus in the movie, when the mother knows that her daughter will come back home, she was very excited. however, the meanest mother in law did something tricky so that they cant go back. the mother waited until she had an accident and the daughter didnt know about it bcoz the 'snake' didn't told her. then, bla.. bla.. the daughter had her chance to go back home. but, its too late coz the mother died.

this moment, i remembered my family at home again. and for a sec, i feel so guilty leaving my mum and dad there just to follow my dream. but, my sense come back before my emotion come all over me. i have a dream and that dream is to make my parents happy and proud. i know they are happy when they saw i'm happy. i always missing them lately and that drama just let my emotion burst.


i miss my family........

i hate arguing. no matter with who. because i will not win. i'm hardly win, win. i'll be the one who listen to the person i'm arguing at whether i am the one bringing the topic or not. is just not my style to argue with people. if i have something to say or issues, i'll do this. writing it out.

the one that i wrote is exactly what i want to say. however, if i said it, it wont be the same as what i wrote. i dont know why. and sometimes, things i've said is just ridiculous and unacceptable. i know it because i'll recall things i've said. then, i'll regret it if i'm messed up and relief when nothings wrong.

ahhh... i'm sucks at this. because last nite, i'm arguing with someone and the result, i lost then lose. totally unprepared. damn! we'll continue 'discussing' about that thing tomorrow.

one more thing... i couldn't sleep rite now just because of that thing. if i choose not to think, i'm the one that in trouble, and if i'm thinking about it, i might got major headache. no matter what, i am the one with the problem.

i wish i only have an assignment or report to finish and then submit it on the next day. at least the 'problem' can be solved immediately. but, how long can u want to be with assignments and reports? as long as u learning the subject, u also need to learn how to live. and now, i'm learning how to live and handle the big assignments in life.

gtg, its late. gud nite.

i miss my mum and dad.. just now, i'm video-calling them using application in the facebook cause its the easiest thing to teach through the phone. while calling them, i took them to a short tour around my house. and now, they know how my house looks like. and later, i'm thinking to give them a tour around this place. where do i buy my food and my stuff, where do i wait for the bus and where is my office. since i dont have my sony any more, i cant vc using my phone..

i'm giving them a surprise next week. i'm going back to kuching! hahah.. but, my mum knows about it.. but my dad doesnt. i cant wait to see how they react and see me later. hihi...

its 11 pm and i have to sleep now coz i am working tomorrow. see ya! gud nite.

what the H!!! u complaint so much! did u see i'm complaining??? give me a break here.

welcome back to me! i am so happy after i knew i can blog again from now on. there is many things going on in my head and i dont think i cant stand 'eating' it alone. i have to throw it away after i forcefully ate it.

this month is very challenging for me. VERY MUCH SIR! and i never think it really happening to me. but it did happen. start from the beginning of the month and even until now. i'll give u the brief:
- i live at my friend's friend house (house A)
- everyday i went back home at 8/9 pm.
- family matters (sister with jpa, brother with ptptn, parents...)
- conflict with friendsss ( a lot....) but still hanging on.
- my soul is not been taken care carefully ( if u know what i mean...)
- the weird thing in house A.. (scary and spooky)
- found the new house - rent a room (house B)
- borrow money from my sister to pay the rent and deposit.
- my parent disagree with the house B - rejected
- found another house (House C) - approved
- have to pack all the things and send it to the new house.
- the next day flew to kl for graduation.
- skip the kl thing coz it was the nicest thing that ever happen to me.
- i have to withdraw a lot of money: for house A and C, plus the kl thing. i may spent almost 1000+ for all of that plus the cost while i am here.
- i need to buy a ticket for raya haji which cost me another 300+
- the broadband 150 coz i cant stand living without internet.
- the laundry for this week cost 20 bucks. (damn!)
- now it almost end of october and i am totally broke.
- what can i say is, i only have two figure in both of my bank acc and at my own...... (but, i still feel that i can pull this thing through and survive. pray for me.)

money is the biggest event for this month. i hope i am not facing it anymore.

about people around me, u can talk anything u want but dont mess with me. its my room, my house and who r u to complaint everything that i hve work for. its about me and i am the one whos living my life here... not u. if u r here and only want to talk crap about my place, it better for u to leave. i dont need people like u. and 1 more thing. if u dont want me to care about u, do not care about me either. what r u thinking? u want me to makan ur budi and then u can talk back about me?? although i know u r good people but in certain way, u annoyed me very much. and sometimes make me mad in the inside.


i think i already makes some of u guys lost in the wonderland.. but, the main point is, i am broke! hahahahah.... btw, gud nite peeps.