Hi. I think its been a century i did not post anything here. Hahha.. *perasan ada reader*. Nevermind..

Today, its been 2 months and 3 weeks i am here working at samur, sipitang sabah. I couldnt felt how fast the time flies.

I never knew I will meet a very different people here. I mean it, different.... In all aspect. Personality, attitude, and of course language.

In here, we work as subcon and our main con is mostly Indonesian and few Japanese. So, the dialect is similar from what we hear in tv but the feeling is different. Hahhaha... What am i mumbling now... What i mean is, it seems like i am not at Malaysia anymore. Felt like different country. Talk with them makes u also talk like them.

Back to our topic. I never knew i can be knowing such a crazy and good frens here. I never knew i can mingle around and felt very comfortable. But, there are also few people with double personalities. I dont really like these people but u still have to smile and act like nothing happen which is not.

Here, i learned how to see people react with work, and also with other people. Some people with excuses.. Some people with empty stories, some are really commited, some just make they own business, some some people just as much as annoying they can be.

I really hope i can learn many things here not just about work, but also about life and people. I hope i can improve my skills and i can be proud to myself..

Nothing much i want to type here coz i just need to get sleepy then sleep. And now, i am sleepy after writing down something *uras* here. Got to go. Write again later.

I feel so lost right now. I dontknow what to think off and i dont know whether i can do it or not.

I hate myself coz cannot really handle this thing properly. I want to be good at all things and i want to be good for myself too.

Right now, there are tonnes of things going on with my life.
- my project uitm is almost finish which is already finish, suppose too.
- i have to transfer at sipitang sabah for new project.
- my site office will be demolished soon and i have to pack all the survey equipment and all the drawings.
- manage 5 chainman which is very hard to do.
- final documentation for all the drawing and survey data.
- sub con still not agree with the final quantity.
- the annoying cns with the emails and questions
- asking question to the no clue person about the site but he is incharge of the site.
- the very much annoyed person talk about black goat and money.
- my transfer date is 26th instead of 1 sept. Hate this very much
- the family day and i couldnt fit with my fav khakis.
- my raya celebration. My raya layer cake.
- interested in japanese class but cant really join the class bcoz of this transfer thingy.
- my head went to haywire and i think my blood pressure are going up.

N now on, i dont think anyone can help me except Almighty Allah... Im seeking ur help to give me strength for me to complete the task smoothly and successfully. Aminn...

haippp... today i'm blogging from my laptop, not on my smartphone, bet smartphone isn't smart enough when come to battery. Time felt much faster by now and everything need to be done immediately. I dont feel the 24 hours a day instead, it feels like just 10 hours. and all of it i spent it on work and office...

Yesterday, I got a hunch to update my details in jobstreet. Maybe its time for me to look a new job since I dont want to stuck here and become a robot. I like staying in the house, eat mommy's and daddy's dishes for free, playing with my cats and kittens, watching astro almost every night and sleep in my own comfortable bedroom. I love all those things, but I have to gain my experience with outside world and join anything in community so that i can learn life is not about work, sleep, tv...

There are many things i want to do in my life, and none of my wish list for 2013 has been completed. Its already July and I really hope I can complete some of my wish list. It needs determination and support from others, but, its ok, I can do it. Just grab that flag and slide down!!!!!! believe in yourself and make sure the intention is right, cause it can really help to decide if need to make a decision.

I just come back from holiday at medan last week and I'll try to post a story about that later. The view is MasyaAllah incredible and amazing...

Hi, I have this friend. She seems different from my other fren. I think we are quite close because almost everyday we'll see each other at work. But, on sunday we will just go with our own separate life.
What i mean by different is, first, she likes to plan everything bcoz she will feel better if she had a plan. It doesnt matter whether the plan will work out or not. For other people, they make plans to make sure all things will go thru smoothly with the plan. Totally different in planning purpose~
Second, she likes too many things. For example, she likes sport expecially basketball, fishing, math, physic, music, poetry (allan poe), orchestra, blackhole, astronomy, drawing or sketching, pool or snooker, swimming, and many more. It is so rare for me to find one person to like so many things which obviously in different angle in life. As if she likes all things except biology and chemisty. She hates them. Totally.
Third, she cant b mad or angry, she will just annoyed and muttering. Just that. In the mean time, she will prank her friend just to make herself feeling better. o_O but, i like it. It makes me feel alive.
Despite on the difference, she can b a friend, motivator, shrink,  colleague, bully, wet blanket,  comedian, story teller, driver and a buddy for me all this time..
There r few things more which she is different from my other frens. But overall, she is normal and fun to be with.. I'm thankful i can be friend with this friend of mine.

I think she is mad at me.. My mum.. Because last night, i come back home at almost 12 am... Earlier that day, she mentioned that she wants to eat outside cause she din cook any for dinner.. I told her that i have a game with my colleague and may come back late for dinner. So, she just bought me a take away..

After the game, i've decided to meet my fren since she will leaving to kl the next day... We had a little chat and stories.... I missed the old time.. Really do...

Then, the thing that make me say she was mad at me is she din really care about me, she din ask anything... Its like a silent punishment. And this morning, she din even talk to me. Usually, she will asked or juz talk anything when i said something.. And yet, she just talking to my dad and make me basically invisible...

Its hurt, and very painful when i know i did made her sad or mad... I really feel that i am not a good daughter for her.. I am not good enough for her to be in the family... I cant decide or divide my time for work, frens and family even myself... And i am very tired... Physically and emotionally.. What should i do.. Tommorow is mother's day and i dont want to ruin it...

Hello there...

This moment, i just wanna say that i am very sorry really deeply sorry about tonite's incident..

I have no intention to run over the poor, afraid and cold frog at the road while im driving back from work... Im trying to dodge them but there is nothing else i can do... I had killed two hopeless frog tonite and i am very sorry about that.

Maybe the frogs just had to be died today on my present at that location. I couldnt say much because it already happen and they are obviously dead... I just want every frog knows that it is not my intention to kill them.. It was an accident.. Tragic accident... I am very sorry for their losses...

*pity the living, not the dead because the living need to move on for their life* - Prof. Dumbledore

Ahooyyy...

Haaa... I am agree with qoute 'legends are lesson'- brave-

Man are predictable.. They r rasional n logic. But, for those who arent, its quite hard to understand.. Just like woman.

I personally cant understand myself.. Haaa... If u know what i mean... I couldnt decide what to follow.. Brain or heart.. It feels some sort of battle inside of me. And after a few hours, im tired and then i just go with the flow.. Hahah..

Truly, i dont know what actually im gonna wrote here.. I just want to say something here.. Owh. I remember...

I am done with u. Please dont chase me anymore.. I cant accept u as what u need me to. So, let just be frens or whatever u want it and let the nature decide..

I'll missed ur text but i dont missed u. I'll missed the fight i have with myself because of u, but i dont want u to stay in. Its complicated and i am done with all this. Thank u for all the memories, and all the thing that u have given me.

U make me realize something about myself and i want to thank u for that. I forgive what u have done to me, and i hope u forgive me too. I am not the best for u and i hope u will find her soon.