All my girlfriend, exes and scandalious are married. What is wrong with me? Oh I know, I am too in love with myself! ahahahaha...

I am so impressed with your drawing. eh. wait. that is my drawing, you bastard!!!

How could you used my drawing. You did not even mentioned to me first. You are not just using it, you even changed it as if that drawing is yours. You changed it, put it in the nice title block and proposed it to my contractor.

Thats my drawing! thats mine. you should informed me at least. I am the one that designed it. that is my office. you are just the supplier. how could you do this to me. I share it to you for your reference. Either to check the dimension or only for internal use. Not as officially used. I could sue you by using my drawing before asking permission.

I am freakin mad after I knew this happen. I cant even talk to you let along to see your face in front of me. In the mean time, I am freakin mad at my boss too. He and she doesnt say anything about them using my drawing to do officially submission of their proposal... There is no one backup for me.

I hate them all. I feel like betrayed by my own team. Very disappointed. Mun di ekotkn hati.. xmok aku mok berik softcopy drawing pake kau. disebabkn boss ak suruh berik. ak berik jak la.. siap kenak perli 'everything you do within office hours is belong to the company' my heart hurts.. Its like been sliced and stabbed by the knife for few times.

I have made my mind.. I dont want to be involved in that thing anymore. I am frustrated. Hope you guys can take charge of that office.. Say that i am over react. i dont care. because.. that is a very unethical things to do. you should feel ashamed of yourself..

This is the 1st blog i wrote for 2016. There are so many things happen. I am gonna post it in December post.

This is my yearly diary. Long story short for every month. Which I remember the important event that had happened.

January ➰
- For this month, there is nothing much happen since I was transfered from Sipitang on October 2015. I had a very tough month coz I am still adapting the environment. 🔖Feeling hard on company vehicle because always broke down. There was one time, I had to walk back from work bcoz I have no car. 😑

February ⏰
- This time, I drove my Akie to KK. ✈ I flew to Miri and waited for my parents to come from Kuching by driving my car. I continued drove from Miri to KK 🚗. As in KK, I brought my parents to sight seeing in KK. My mum loves beautiful scene and my dad just loves to travel.🗻

March 👀
- I cant really remember what had happened in this month. I think this was the month that I always took MC and been attacked by my long lost sickness, asthma🏨. I have to take a NAP (nebulizer) since I really cant breath properly at that time. And the most unfortunate event happened was my room had been attacked by mother nature since i did not closed my window.. 😔 all wet.. my bed. my cloths. my bags. 😥

April 🗻
- In this month... most of my weekend was with my friend. We went for hiking, badminton, sunrising, sunset and lepaking at mamak's stall until midnight. 🎭 I love to see the scenery when you are on the top of the hill. Its refreshing and keep your mind moving and thinking. Plus, I met new friend while joining the hiking team. 🌄

May 👣
- On May, I had my interview in my current place now. It was not a proper plan for looking a new place for work, just a random pick to ease my mom's request on me to work at kuchg. 💪 It was a one day trip and i have no intention to get any of the offer. I just went back to KK and work as normal. 💻

June ☕
- This month was a Fasting month. So, most of the day is about celebrating raya. While in KK, I've met my new housemate which is out of sudden become my very close yet very far friend of mine.😙 However, when i was in Kuchg, I did some layer cake, prepare for raya's dishes, house chores and etc.👩 my life then, was not so complicated as now.

July 💲
- I resigned from BinaPuri Sdn Bhd. We had a farewell party at our own office. The BBQ farewell. I made the chicken mushroom soup and my boss liked it. hehe... 🍜 It was simple yet memorable farewell ever. I missed working with them and I missed my work as civil eng in survey dept. 👼 As I recall back the sweat and blood for me to climb up the stairs was not easy. I really gained my knowledge and experiences through the tough road...🔨

August 🔮
- This was the month where I stepped in the new working place and environment. Its in kuchg and when I was there, at the HQ for reporting duty, there are also bunch of old people coming too, for reporting duty. In my brain, wow.. there are a lot of newcomers.. 👞 This month was very challenging since I hve to fight with myself everyday about the decision of moving to the new place. 💆 Its tiring. 2 weeks I was in HQ, kuchg. another 2 weeks move to Tondong Inn. I have to stay there since the staff house was located just few steps beside the temporary site office. 😂

September 👒
- Here, I flew back to KK to drive back my Akie to Kuching. 😌 Before that, me and my sister went sight seeing at KK town and I brought her to Kokol for her birthday! 🎊. We stayed at the hotel and had nice breakfast together.😋 The next day, my parents came from tawau. Only that, I drove until Miri and then had a direct flight to Kuching. ✈ My parents continued the journey from Miri to Kuching on the next day. 🚗

October 🚩
- For this month, most of the time I spend it with my virtual run. 👟 I have a few vr in october and I did accomplished it all. 🎯 I have a very high motivation in this month. and i lose some weight.😬

November ♻
- I had a very memorable short breakaway for this month. It was in KK which I spend most of the time with my besties. 👭👫 I did put the summary in my ig (amirah.rb) It was the best yet tired trip ever. I missed them so much. 😌 They moulded me to be a better person and I kinda thankful for that. 💝

December 💞
- For this month, I had a very special birthday ever. I got a surprise birthday party at my office.👓 of course lead by my crazy friends here. Then, I had a bowling party with my family and for the first time i almost beat my brother's score. 🎳 I had a christmas vacation just after my birthday. We celebrate at Borneo Highland. 🏰Spending time at that place was breath taking moment. ⏳ I wish to go there again, but its not me that driving up the hill.  ahahah.. Not to forget... surprise present! 📦 I got a few of birthday presents from my friends.. 🎁 Thank you guys. you are the best!! 😍

I think that was the sum up of my 2016... Which... I can say very challenging and yet the most fun year ever. 🔱 Many ups and downs that I have to face. I hope I can be better for the next year 2017. 😘

Haaaaa.... I am in the flight bound for kuching rite now AK6355. How I wish I did not do what I did last week. How I wish things will go back normal again. How I wish this ia not happening..

They are several type of people that I couldnt handle by myself, which is the stubborn and ego person. This kind of people will become the pain in the ass when the time is not rite. They will become so aggresive and tough with you. However they can become gentle if you did not mess with them.

Beside.. I can get along with this kind of people but sometimes, the limit is overrated. You cant do anything bcoz they are powerful then you are. All you can do is sit back n let the time fix anything.

And now, I dont know what to think coz I din know where i do wrong. Maybe I din do anything or maybe i did something that might upset her. So, I hope she will recover and I can do my work as before...

Hi there,

How r u? I dont know how u've been although we live together.. Here, I want to say I am very sorry if there is anything I did or said that make u mad, stressed  or annoyed. This is the only way that i know u will read this. As we've been friends for only 6 months, I barely know u and from what I knew, U are very most caring person yet very stubborn. I'm sorry if I annoyed u again.

Its almost a month that we din't talk to each other. I dont know whether u r mad at me or others. And I just assume at me cause u din't want to talk to me about anything u stressed off as we always do.

If u really mad at me or its just my feeling, please do not do this silent thingy at kuming. She really respect u as her leader, motivator and teacher. Plus, very very adore u as her friend.. I dont want the last memories of u guys is not talking to each other.

Because of ur absent yesterday, everyone is asking and we dont really have the answer. And that makes the situation become more tight..

As for me, I just want to know why did u behave like this. Making scary face n not talking is not the solution I want and this is not a normal silent. I know u will ignore this cause u think its weird or 'lain....' but for me, i cant speak so i will write...

Thank you for reading this, and I hope u will find ur happiness that u r looking for. Btw, I rarely say this but I miss our time together..

Hi. I think its been a century i did not post anything here. Hahha.. *perasan ada reader*. Nevermind..

Today, its been 2 months and 3 weeks i am here working at samur, sipitang sabah. I couldnt felt how fast the time flies.

I never knew I will meet a very different people here. I mean it, different.... In all aspect. Personality, attitude, and of course language.

In here, we work as subcon and our main con is mostly Indonesian and few Japanese. So, the dialect is similar from what we hear in tv but the feeling is different. Hahhaha... What am i mumbling now... What i mean is, it seems like i am not at Malaysia anymore. Felt like different country. Talk with them makes u also talk like them.

Back to our topic. I never knew i can be knowing such a crazy and good frens here. I never knew i can mingle around and felt very comfortable. But, there are also few people with double personalities. I dont really like these people but u still have to smile and act like nothing happen which is not.

Here, i learned how to see people react with work, and also with other people. Some people with excuses.. Some people with empty stories, some are really commited, some just make they own business, some some people just as much as annoying they can be.

I really hope i can learn many things here not just about work, but also about life and people. I hope i can improve my skills and i can be proud to myself..

Nothing much i want to type here coz i just need to get sleepy then sleep. And now, i am sleepy after writing down something *uras* here. Got to go. Write again later.

I feel so lost right now. I dontknow what to think off and i dont know whether i can do it or not.

I hate myself coz cannot really handle this thing properly. I want to be good at all things and i want to be good for myself too.

Right now, there are tonnes of things going on with my life.
- my project uitm is almost finish which is already finish, suppose too.
- i have to transfer at sipitang sabah for new project.
- my site office will be demolished soon and i have to pack all the survey equipment and all the drawings.
- manage 5 chainman which is very hard to do.
- final documentation for all the drawing and survey data.
- sub con still not agree with the final quantity.
- the annoying cns with the emails and questions
- asking question to the no clue person about the site but he is incharge of the site.
- the very much annoyed person talk about black goat and money.
- my transfer date is 26th instead of 1 sept. Hate this very much
- the family day and i couldnt fit with my fav khakis.
- my raya celebration. My raya layer cake.
- interested in japanese class but cant really join the class bcoz of this transfer thingy.
- my head went to haywire and i think my blood pressure are going up.

N now on, i dont think anyone can help me except Almighty Allah... Im seeking ur help to give me strength for me to complete the task smoothly and successfully. Aminn...