Haaaa... I just got back from outing with my frens... And its 1:30am... Hahahhaha... I feel a little bit insecure coz my parents is here at home. However, its been a while i din hangin out at nite.. All for me is work and work..

Sometimes, going for karaoke or bowling, mid nite muvie did give me some space to breath... Its not that i dont like staying here, juz i dont want my parents to be worried and i hope they can trust me even wherever am i will be later on.

I hope my parents din blame my frens for taking me out at nite and i hope my frens will not afraid to ask me out at nite again..

I am in big dilemma... Hurmm... I like here but its best when i have my freedom too... I'm sorry if i ever did trouble u with my prob. I appreciate it.. Thank you.

Btw, i have to go now, to sleep..  since tomorrow i have to go to work. Haaa... Gud nite folks.

Sedeh juak la... X dpdh.. P xpa... Kmk bukn sepa2... I'll train my heart and mind to stay focus and be better.. I want to be better and then the best i can be.

Pagi tek... Ak ng xtauk la phl ak mok melawan... Tp, point ak simple jak. Xplu mok pdh bnda nok negative jak... Mun mok pdh pun, tuka la jd positif.. Sak x sakit ati nengar..

Ak melawan alu ak rsa ak derhaka. Ak la jaik.. Suma x betol. Xpt ka klaka bnda nok bgus2 jak. Memg la as reminder, tp mun dh bekali kali... Angol jd.

Ko pdh perange ak x berubah gk.. Perange ney gk mok ak ubah?? If ak ubah suma ekot pa ko mok, bgus ku jd robot jak nk. Nothing else left as myself.

Ak stress dolok time stadi x sampe darah ak nait. X lmk ak ctok, pande nait darah... Adeiii... Tp, tok slh ak dikpun juak kali. Xtauk la.

Btw, post tok based on perasaan ak jak. Mun sapa2 baca ada terasa, xda kaitan ngn ktorg sbnrnya.

Dh la. Xda point mok ngerepak kedak org tua pnjg2 ctok..

Haiizzz... What happen to our people nowadays... They only can see and comment what they read in the screen without thinking what is the main point of the writer.

It is some sort of disappointment for me when people is easily judge other people juz bcoz of what he/she did or wrote. We really dont know what is their intention when doing it.

Have u watch die hard 3 when all the games are only a distraction so that they can rob a bank without any authority survellience. All the good guy already focus on the bad guy's games.

This is what happen when we easily judge other people. They may have another big intention and with u acting like what they want, they know, they are winning..

So, dont judge without nothing. U r allowed to judge when u think u r perfect. If not, u can juz sit back and enjoy what people say..

Haaa.. I donno what happen to myself lately. Btw, there is one guy at my office, let called him 'tupei' coz it suit him. Wahahhaha.. (evil laugh)

This tupei basicly make my life sooooo misrable and tense. I cant do my own work coz i have to do all his demands about drawing at site. Not once, not twice or not thrice ( thrice??? Wujud ka.. Hahha..) but many times I have to amend the drawing just for him to look at. Damn!! I feel stupid. Screw u tupei.

I hate it when everytime i saw u opened that door and look straight at me.. I wish i can be invisible. Coz i know, when u entered our office, u need my help to draw samthing for u. Arghh.. Its sucks!

All the thing u want me to do can be done by urself. U're the bosssssss!!! u have to do ur own decision! Not me, fool! U are the reason i hate to go to work. And bcoz of my people, i brace myself to go.

One more thing, can u speak louder please....???? I bet my watch's ticks is louder than ur voice. N makes me feel guilty when i rise up my voice to u. Huh.

I really hope i can stay here until the end coz i want to show that i can do it. And its been a long time i din prove something to myself.

Enough about tupei, his story will not stop until this peoject ends. So, i have to go now. Need sleep and rest. See ya.

I donno whether i want to share it here or not... But i need to let it out coz i have to...

I'll write in my language, n i bet no one will read this either. So, doesnt matter at all...

Dolok, ak bait la wlpn xla bait glak. Bait as in xmok polh mak bpk sedeh. Do anything for them wlpn ad time rebel juak. Blaja, dpt result bgus, cdak hepi... Ya ku polh dolok k cdaknya..

Dh ku further blaja, ak rsa bebas.. Tp, kebebasan ku d tahan d ats sbb2 tertentu.. Dan ak redha.. Malah, ak hepi glak2... Perasaan ukhwah ya paling sweet ak penah rsa. Sampe dpt polh ati ku yg keras ya jd lembut..

However... Suma ya x lamak.... Lps ku berhijrah gk tmpt lain, suma bnda berubah. Ak try mok maintain but dunia lua ak besa glak n ak xpt lawan sorg2... N ak ngalah. Tp, ati ak maseh nekad mok stay as it is. Lamak2... Ak xpt tahan.. Ak ng kalah. Tewas abis ngn dunia...Rsa besalah ya xpt d pike gk.. Tp, dh slalu... Suma jd biasa.

Ak jd lalai abis. Tp bnda wajib ak try jaga gk.. Cuma kdg2.. Lps juak.. Makin lamak, makin ilang jak ilmu2 ak dpt dolok2.. Adala tinggal skit2.. Bnda ak polh slalu, x d polh gk.. Malas sngt menguasai diri... Rsa mok enjoy jak...

Lamak2... Ak pilih mok jd org normal. So, ak jd org normal.. Bz ngn dunia.. Rohani d berik mkn pun ckup2 jak... Berusaha juak la mok berik mkn ya, tp napsu tok ssh mok jaga mun dh d manjak glak...

N dekat ujong2 ak blaja, ak danugerahkan seseorg yg boleh polh ak ingt balit betapa ilmu ak dolok sngt penting... Kmkorg slalu bkongsi ilmu, apa2 jak... Suma bnda masok. Ak maseh jd org normal tp berilmu skit.. Ak suka daktok.. Tp suma bnda x kekal.. Ak terpksa berhijrah gk...

Penghijrahan tok paling sakit ak rsa. Tp, ak try juak. Wlpn sorg2, still juak try for the best. Time tok ak xtauk brapa kali ak rsa besalah dgn Nya.. Ak maseh gk mcm dolok.. Cuma ad kurg skit. Lamak2 ak dh biasa..

Lps ya, ak pindah gk tmpt lain. Tmpt tok ng mencabar iman dan sabar. Mcm2 jd... Ak time tok ng totally normal. Xda glak kamboh mok molh bnda2 aneh.. Malas jak byk. Passion dh kurg dh. Tired sbb ingt keja jak x abis2...

Amazingly, ak xtauk la dakne, ak d anugerahkan gk seseorg... Org tok lain skit. Cerita nya lain. Tp, sma jak pointnya. Molah ak ingt balit betapa ak dolok byk blaja ilmu mcm2.. Ny pun suka ilmu, ak try carik balit ilmu2 yg penah ak blaja dolok, n kmkorg salu kongsi2.. Tp, suma x sma cam dolok.

Nektok, ak try mok jd org biasa tp dlm ng berilmu. Apa2 ilmu la. Yg wajib ya boh lupak.. Try abis2 unless memg darurat. Dolok ak kamboh ngn dunia sbb ak tkut dgn komitmen lain. Ak xpt mok balance nya. Ad juak berat sebelah.

N this time, ak xmok jd org normal berilmu gk. Ak mok jd org yg berguna k org lain n dlm msa yg sma i am a balance person. Dunia ada.. Akhirat pun ada. Ak mok dpt jaga dirik ak dikpun balit dri segi fizikal n rohani.. Dgn kata lain, eksesais n ngaji. Ad 2 2.. Camya la.. Hati mok d cuci lok.. Pasya jaga kan nya...

Sbb hati sngt penting.. Nya fragile glak pun xpt.. Stiff glak pun xpt. Kuatkn dgn iman, lembutkn dgn iman. InsyaAllah, hope jak, doa boh benti, hati bgus, so suma anggota lain ya bgus juak..

Hahahha... Yesterday was awesome yet surprised for me. Going fishing for the first time was awesome but getting news that my blood pressure is on the border line was shocked.

However, this make me realize that health is important and make sure i dont skip my excercise.

There is one fren which i barely knew but i think i already knew her. She juz came to my life and make my life miserable and hectic but in the good way.

She makes me feel mcm2.. Happy, sad, disappointed, fun, and all the feeling u can think of. I am very blessed that she came to my life. Thank you God.

P/s: Wak, u still my person but u r not here, she is and always b.